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THEORIES ABOUT THE UNIVERSE by Blythe Baird (via thearistocatic)

(Source: blythebrooklyn, via sarrahcatherine)

I am trying to see things in perspective. My dog wants a bite of my peanut butter chocolate chip bagel. I know she cannot have this, because chocolate makes dogs very sick. My dog does not understand this. She pouts and wraps herself around my leg like a scarf and purrs and tries to convince me to give her just a tiny bit. When I do not give in, she eventually gives up and lays in the corner, under the piano, drooping and sad. I hope the universe has my best interest in mind like I have my dog’s. When I want something with my whole being, and the universe withholds it from me, I hope the universe thinks to herself: "Silly girl. She thinks this is what she wants, but she does not understand how it will hurt.

vamellope:

lyricynicism:

vamellope:

straight males in yogurt shop tolerance level: 0

The worst is when I give a little boy a pink spoon (or he even ASKS for a pink spoon!) and his mom and dad glare at me as if I’m Satan himself trying to corrupt their kid with a fucking colored disposable spoon.

REAL TALK

(via lntternetexplorer)

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